Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others.

Messiahs aren’t allowed to improvise.

Don’t put Pop Rocks on your penis. Apparently that is why they are banned in Australia.

You’d think that it would be a given to not put exploding sugar on your reproductive organs, but Australia is basically Japan on a dare.

Check out D3 friend Phillip Figglebottom making it to the big time! http://ow.ly/DzQKW

Dr. Strange’s real 1st name is “Gettinsome” #MarvelPhase3Reveals

Honey BooBoo is the great great granddaughter of Porkins #StarWars7PlotLeaks

^D3 We don’t have any welfare pumpkins here! #rehearsalquotesoutofcontext

^D3 ‘I twist my nipples for Jesus!’ #rehearsalquotesoutofcontext

I actually find it kind of sad that I have never loved anything as much as Ickey Woods loves cold cuts.