We know exactly how you feel, mushrooms…

• Happy Birthday?

• 3 Days of Peace, Love, and…all TO HELL WITH IT!

• Just be glad nobody ordered a Moscow Mule…

• It wasn’t me! It was the one-armed Mexican!

• Do NOT ask what the chocolate jimmies are made from.

• The sequel to Shawshank Redemption looks AWFUL.

• Rosebud…

• And I thought the sushi was fresh.

• Ass, gas, or grass…

• On second thought go ahead and skip the frothed milk.

• Oh, irony. We don’t get that here.

I don’t know about you but I am ready for a drink now.

If you see anything WTF-worthy leave it in the comments below or find me on Twitter at @arrpeebee.

See you in the tragedy papers!