Don’t know if Facebook told you or not but there’s an election wrapping up in the US today, and for a lot of us it is the most stressful and consequential election in our lifetimes. So take a moment, step away from Nate Silver’s panic sweats, and join me in an oasis of election-free dumbassery.

• Sounds to me like he got his money’s worth.

• THIS is where I want my tax dollars going from now on.

• Well, he’s no Hannibal Lecter.

• I know you’re partial to convenient stores, but dammit, H.I., the sun doesn’t rise and set on the corner grocery.

• No Stairway?!? Denied!

• If the bar is a rockin’…it’s probably trespassing.

• Nothing but respect for MY Queen.

• Still better than eating kale.

• Whoever had “murderous caterpillars” on their 2020 bingo card come on down and collect your winnings.

• HOW DID IT TAKE 3 TIMES FOR HIM TO BE FIRED?!?!?